“If more information was the answer, then we’d all be billionaires with perfect abs” - Derek Sivers
In the last couple of years, I’ve gone from being an overly-analytical, self-loathing nerd trying to be Stoic, to feeling more comfortable in my own skin. I’d like to help you get more of what you want, in careful balance with becoming more comfortable with how you already are. Luckily, those two go together.
My areas of focus
Burnout, procrastination and unknotting internal tensions: Exploring what you want, intrinsic motivation, and what you value.
Emotional Maturity and Emotional Intelligence: Learning from the information and value in difficult emotions and difficult conversations.
Internal Family Systems coaching: A kind of emotional work that can illuminate your mental habits, motivations, and patterns of getting in your own way.
Meditation: The awareness and acceptance built here can make any other tool more useful.
Finding collaborators, creating teams: Exploring social dynamics, and social skills. Finding + creating collaborators, groups, and teams that will support you over the long run.
Career planning and exploring EA: I enjoy digging into people’s uncertainties about EA and how to relate to it, especially when it can feel demanding, confusing, or alienating.
I’ve worked in the EA and Applied Rationality communities for 2+ years: I was the Head of Events at an EA community-building startup, and currently work on operations and student development for SPARC. I’ve designed and run workshops on decision-making, goal-setting, rationality, meditation, and trauma for students from top universities in the UK and the US.
Here’s a quick summary of some of my other experience:
I don’t have any special knowledge to sell you, but I do have experience in cultivating the conditions that can allow you to better understand yourself and get out of your own way.
How I coach
Regardless of the tools and approach we decide to use together, I respect that eventually, you must figure things out for yourself.
It took me a long time to realize that some guy writing a self-help book or blog post isn’t some guy telling me what to do — he is just a living example of painstakingly figuring out what works for himself.
On one hand:
I wish you could just do what I did.
but much of the challenge is figuring out what works for you.
And I wish I could just tell you my best guess for what you should do.
But that would take away your opportunity to learn to trust yourself and make better decisions for yourself.
On the other hand:
I want to create a supportive environment for you to have the motivation, self-compassion, space, and time to look deeply at yourself, understand your underlying assumptions and choices more clearly, feel your feelings more fully, and take your best guess at where you’d like to go next.
Only you can help yourself, but it’s pretty hard to help yourself without someone encouraging you to, exploring with you, and nudging you to do so.
Almost no one can do this alone, and unfortunately, our culture makes these processes especially hard.
If we only have one hour every couple of weeks together, one of the most valuable things we could do is set you up to be around better environments, teams, and people to support you in the other 167 hours.
I’m excited to possibly be the start of your support network and at the same time to help you find and build the rest of your support network.
Set up a call